


Slowly and Then All At Once

by OneOfThoseCrazyGirls



Series: What Should’ve Been [7]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Introspection, Season/Series 01, Season/Series 02
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-30 18:40:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17834012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneOfThoseCrazyGirls/pseuds/OneOfThoseCrazyGirls
Summary: How Oliver fell in love with FelicityThis fic is part of the What Should’ve Been ‘verse, but can be read as it’s own standalone thing if you want.





	Slowly and Then All At Once

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone!
> 
> Like I said in the summary, this fic is part of the What Should’ve Been ‘verse.
> 
> The title comes from the John Green quote “I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.”
> 
> Enjoy!

The first time Oliver knew he liked Felicity was the first time he met her. He had spent so much time in darkness, meeting her was like having a beam of light shine down on him; it was like a breath of fresh air. He was intrigued by her. So far, everyone else in his life had been tip-toeing around him. They didn’t talk about the island-sized elephant in the room. Even though they were all his friends and family, he still felt so tense and on-edge around them. But when he met Felicity, he actually felt relaxed for the first time in years. She rambled on about his father being dead and it should’ve made him angry, but it didn’t. He actually liked her blunt honesty and no-nonsense attitude. She even made him smile—a genuine smile; he didn’t think he was still capable of that. It made him feel strange, to be honest. How could he feel so at ease with a perfect stranger but not with people he had known his whole life? Oliver thought that maybe that was why he kept going back to her even though he knew it was dangerous to keep involving her in his nightly activities—because he desperately wanted to know what her secret was. It was like he was a nut that only she could crack and he needed to know why that was.

* * *

 

The first time Oliver thought he might be attracted to Felicity was the night the two of them and Dig went to that auction to take down the Dodger. Felicity wore that gold dress and Oliver was actually shocked to see her like that. Before then, he had only ever seen her in work attire: blouses or the occasional sweater and pencil skirts. Sure, even before that night he could acknowledge that she was objectively pretty, but just not his type—a bit too nerdy for his taste. But that night at the auction, with that shimmering gold dress and the way she wore her hair, she looked truly beautiful. But, at the time, Oliver just wrote that feeling off as nothing more than him, a heterosexual male, appreciating a woman’s beauty. They were friends, after all, and friends could acknowledge each other’s attractiveness without wanting to sleep together. And after that one night, she went back to her regular work-attire wardrobe and he never really gave her looks another moment’s thought.

* * *

 

The first time Oliver thought he might have non-platonic feelings for Felicity was right before the Undertaking when she told him that she would stay in the foundry even though it would be dangerous and she could potentially get killed. That was the first time he realized how brave she really was. And there was just something about the way she was willing to stand by him that caused something—although he didn’t know exactly what—to stir deep inside of him. At the time, he pushed whatever those feelings were aside, figuring it was just the life-threatening danger they were about to face that caused them. But the feelings kept gnawing at him.

When he returned to the island, he spent most of his time thinking about Tommy and his mother and Thea and even Laurel. Occasionally, he would think about Dig and Felicity but he didn’t really miss them...or so he thought. Because, one night, he had a dream about Felicity. It was nothing special really. He just dreamed that they were in the foundry together and they were talking. He couldn’t remember what exactly they were talking about, but he remembered them having a conversation. After that one dream, he started to think about her a lot. The thoughts were always innocent, but they still happened often. They were frequent enough that it actually surprised him. But what surprised him more was that he actually started to miss her. He would think about times during his five years away when it would’ve been easier if she had been there. And he would think about how it would be easier if she had been with him on the island then. Although he didn’t realize how much he actually missed her until she and Dig showed up on the island and he saw her face again. He told himself he was returning to Starling for his family, but there was a part of him that was returning for Felicity.

* * *

 

The first time Oliver was certain he was attracted to Felicity, it was a Tuesday afternoon and one of the rare times he actually decided to come into the office. He was bored with whatever papers were on his desk and he looked up to see Felicity working at her desk. Her ankles were crossed under her desk and he noticed that she had taken her shoes off. She was typing away at her computer and chewing on her bottom lip and the way that the sunlight reflected off her hair and skin, she looked like she was glowing. She was so beautiful and Oliver couldn’t help but smile. He imagined walking up to her and tucking one of her long blonde locks behind her ear and tracing his fingers along her jaw; he wondered if her skin was really as soft as it looked.

This became a habit of his whenever he was at the office. That’s mostly why he rarely showed up to work. He always told Felicity that it was because he was busy with Arrow business or spending time with his family, but really, it was just because, whenever he was at the office he never got anything done because he was too busy staring at her.

* * *

 

The first time Oliver thought he might love Felicity was the night she got kidnapped by the Count. He didn’t just break his vow not to kill, he completely lost control. He could’ve incapacitated the Count and sent him back to prison. But when Oliver saw the Count’s fingers brushing through Felicity’s hair; when he held the syringe up to her throat, Oliver just felt this white-hot rage inside him and all he could think about was making sure the Count could never touch Felicity again.

But one arrow would’ve done the trick. He didn’t need to fire three. And yet he did. He always thought that a bow was a weapon of control—to fire arrows you always have to be relaxed and in complete control of your emotions—but there was nothing controlled about putting three arrows into the Count. He just couldn’t stop himself.

Which is what made loving Felicity so dangerous. Yes, being with her could distract him from his mission—not to mention that he wasn’t good enough for her anyway—but he also couldn’t afford to lose control like that again.

So he buried his feelings down as deep as he could. He even told her, point blank, that he couldn’t be with her and then got back together with Sara. He did everything he could to convince himself that he wasn’t in love with her. And, for a time, he actually believed it.

* * *

 

The first time that Oliver realized that Felicity was the love of his life and there would never be anyone else was the night of the siege. He had lost so much and knew he would lose even more, but Felicity continued to stand by him and she refused to give up on him or let him give up.

He had tried, successfully for the most part, to bury his feelings for Felicity. But when she hugged him in the clock tower, it was like a dam broke and he knew there was no going back.

That’s how he instantly knew exactly how to outsmart Slade. Slade wanted to kill the woman he loved and Slade thought that woman was Laurel—and, once upon a time, it was. But not anymore. Slade took the wrong woman.

Oliver spent so much time hung up on Laurel that not Slade, or even he thought he would ever fall in love with anyone else. Laurel was the first girl he ever loved, but Felicity was the last.

And as Oliver held her in that clock tower and felt her warmth against him he knew...it would always be Felicity.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> I would really appreciate your feedback so please leave a comment and don’t forget to hit that kudos button! ;)
> 
> Find me on Tumblr: oneofthosecrazygirls-fics


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